Morning Pages Entry – April 03, 2014

All right, this could be one of those days, where I just ramble along about whatever. There’s nothing really pressing at the moment that I feel the need to write about, however, now that I write that something does come to mind. And that is time management. It’s something that I feel I’ve never done well, but always wanted to do better. I worry and procrastinate about so many things that need to get done it’s ridiculous. And, the more I procrastinate about something the harder it is for me to actually get it done. Things high on the hit list for me to procrastinate about are taxes, the boat, and things around the house. Of course work can be in there sometimes too, and the writing has been just one of those things. I think, maybe now would be a good time to go back and review Tony Robbins tapes about the whole pain and pleasure thing. We procrastinate on things, because our mind tells us it’s going to be a painful experience, and we’d rather just avoid doing it for the moment. For me, you can throw in the worry and guilt for not getting those things done as well. Which, just seems to compound everything. I have been finding lately, that the one biggest thing I worry about for the most part, is that my business is not making enough money, and is not doing very well. And, subsequently, I just focus on that, to the detriment of all other tasks on my plate. So, if I can just get to doing better with my regular work and business, then I would think I could get to the other stuff. I do waste too much time surfing around the internet, and getting distracting by all the shiny things I find there. I don’t know, how to get around that. Except, to get more excited about my writing and how that is doing. I am able to do that for periods of time, and as of late I’ve been better about it. I could certainly do ever better though. I really think, that if I could just get my first novel out there, then it would be easier to get excited about the writing thing. If I had a novel published, and had people buying it, commenting on it, or generally just interacting with me about it, then things would be better. I would at least feel more of an obligation and excitement towards the novel. Which, of course all comes back to getting the first book out there and finished. I’m getting closer to having the first draft done. I did about 1300 words yesterday, which should still be so much more. I should be averaging at least 3000 words per day, but to be honest, it should be more in the 5000 vicinity. I really need to commit to that. The most I’ve ever done, is about 3400+ words. I know, I can do 5K days, but I just need to commit to that. I need to focus, shut off the internal editor in my brain, and get er done. That’s really the key to everything. If I could do that for 3 weeks out of every month or so, then I’d publish a book a month. Even if I could do that for every 3 out of 6 weeks, I could likely publish a book every month and a half. That wouldn’t be so bad either. That gives me a pretty good 75K chunk of first draft to work with. Definitely a good sized book, and by the end of the summer, I’d have 3 or 4 books on the market. Then, I’d really know how viable this thing was. I’d at least have some feedback on how good or crappy my stuff was. I think, it has the potential to be good, but the actual writing skills I have need a bit of work. I’m still confused about first person and third person crap. I keep drifting back and forth between the two, and my internal critic keeps getting worked up about that. I need a more definitive answer on it. I guess I just keep worrying, that it’s one of those rules your not supposed to break. But, I do seem to really want to keep doing it while I’m writing. I’m not sure if that’s just being lazy, because I don’t know how to write the story without that style of prose.

TIGERBLOOD: yep DAILYMOOD: good LOCATION: living room WORDSWRITTEN: 1325 PUSHUPS: 2:00 wall sits TODO: writing, editing, get car TV: supernatural BOOK: The Descent Series by SM Reine GAME: Batman Arkam City EXERCISE: none WEIGHT: 173 BREAKFAST: bacon & eggs LUNCH: big ass salad DINNER: pulled pork SNACKS: orange, grapes ALCOHOL: none BEDTIME: 12:30 AWAKE: 5:00 & 9:00

 

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