Morning Pages Entry – December 10, 2013

Yep, the key to being good at something, is finding a passion for it, and the key to being passionate for it, is to be happy when your doing it. At least I think that’s how it should work. Be depressed, and full of worry, is not going to help out with what your trying to accomplish. Don think of the big momumental task your trying to accomplish . . . you have to think of it in tiny pieces, and remember the theory of the pale blue dot . . . none of it really matters in the end. Right here, and right now, your present self needs to be happy and fufilled with what it’s doing. It’s got nothing to do with your memory self, or your future self, or any other shit. You do need to understand what it meands to live in the moment, and to truly enjoy that moment. Your life is full of billions of moments, and whether you remember them all or not (or document them through a myriad of social media is irrelevant). What’s important to your whole sum of a person and your ongoing happiness, is that you learn to get the most out of every moment you live. Fear is the real enemy here, as well as apprehension, and worry, and caring to much about what others will think and do in reaction to your behaviour. Find the things, the work that truly fills you up with happiness, and a sense of accomplishment. That’s where you need to guide and focus your self to. I do believe, that my writing can take me there. You do need to fill the world and your day with some sort of activity. You’ll be bored, if you just sit around watching TV, and playing video games. Not that you can’t do those things otherwise. I actually feel more into TV shows and video games, if I take care of the work side of things first. Knowing that the financial side of things is being taken care of as well as the fulfilment side of things allows me to relax into my recreational activities that much more. I laugh much more when watching comedies, and I get into video games so much more, when I know the side of me that needs to do things has done it’s thing. Finding happiness . . . finding happiness . . . finding happiness is so critical to the success of my life. Not just my work, but my life. You’ve always liked the idea of fiction with a lot of fiction in it. You like the idea of world building. Using your imagination to create a place that you and others can inhabit just because it’s different then where you are now. Suppose you do get good at building those places, and you make a bunch of money doing it, and everyone loves your stories. Does that mean you’ll actually be happier in your current life, and have no need to build those places? I certainly hope not. Are they really places to go to and escape, or are they just places to go to because they are cool. Because they’re fun. Being happy in one place doesn’t necessarily mean you don’t want to go to another place and have some fun. Actually, quite the contrary. I think I would want to go to even more places, and enjoy them more, because I’m that much more relaxed with my basic needs being fufilled and completed. Being a writer, is a lot like being a traveller. A traveller to all sorts of places. Places in space, places in time, places in other worlds, places in strange and imaginative minds. My mind. A place that’s totally fabricated for me and by me. But one, that hopefully others will want to go. Because, as much as you don’t want to care what others think, you do want to spend time with others. We are social creatures. I think, I just don’t want that to be a force that drives me to withdraw from my potential. I’m a smart guy, that makes risky decisions about life. But, hey, the status quo sucks. What’s the point of playing it safe? What’s the adventure in that? Just because you’ve had a few set backs, doesn’t mean crap. It just highlights that you’ve taken chances that didn’t turn out. You were wrong about some things. So what? Everybody is pretty much wrong about something all the time. I’m just better at it then the average joe. Time to revel in that, and have fun with it. Live in the moment.

LOCATION: home office WORDS WRITTEN: 0 PUSHUPS: 20 TODO: 2000+ words, put some sites back up TV: TED talks BOOK: none GAME: none EXERCISE: weights – quick fix WEIGHT: 179 BREAKFAST: bacon and eggs LUNCH: none DINNER: none SNACKS: orange, grapes, paleo approved trail mix ALCOHOL: none BEDTIME: 12:30 am AWAKE: 7:45 am

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