Morning Pages Entry – February 21, 2014

Yesterday, was just a crap day. All around. First, I realized I hadn’t yet lined up a replacement for Devan in league play, then I found out James couldn’t make it, then I got stuck playing Tony, who of course lost. Then I ended up losing my match, when I had 2 match balls in the 5th after coming back from being down 2-0, and was incredibly pissed off over the thing. Not my idea of a good time. Maybe I take this shit too seriously. I really wanted that win yesterday, as I wanted to hold on to first place for the regular season. Now, I’m not sure if we will. But, as I think about it, that may be so bad. If we end up in second, then I think we can avoid Kyles team in the semi finals, and end up giving us both a chance to make it to the finals before we play each other. They would have to play the Fitness Forum team on their courts, but who knows, maybe they could take them. Kyle is playing really well, and if the rest of the team picks it up, then maybe that could happen. I’ll have to take a look at the numbers from this week, and see where we end up. The other bad news yesterday was though, that I found out David Seuzle won’t be around the week of semi-finals. Which does not bode well for us. We would like have to play the Athletic club team, and that could be really tough without David. We could possibly win, but I don’t know. It all depends who shows up for them. It would either be them or Rob Rices team. Probably Athletic Club though. We’ll see where the numbers fall. It would be pretty good, to get Kyle and my team into the finals at London Squash for C. It won’t be an easy task though. I do take this shit way too seriously though. I was manicaly depressed last night after losing that match, and ended up staying awake till 3am playing video games, trying to get the bad tasted from that loss out of my mouth. The guy I played, shouldn’t even really be playing. And Bert, should know better, then playing that guy from Athletic Club on their team, when they have paid guys not playing. Ah well. The real problem here, that’s nagging the hell out of me, is I’m stalled once again in the writing category. I need to do some reorganizing and editing, and rewriting of sections of my book, if I’m going to move it into the next phase. This is taking me way too long to get things done, but I got so distracted with other stupid league shit yesterday, that I just couldn’t focus on it. Even today, I still couldn’t focus on getting it done. Man, I so hate playing Tony last night. He sucks so bad. Just awful. That’s 3 out of the 4 times I’ve played him this year, he ended up losing, and the team ended up losing on those matches. I could barely stand to watch the shit. And, then even Eric mentioned, that he has some work shit the week of semi-finals. That would not be good. What the hell is wrong with these people. We can’t afford to be missing those players on that night. I mean really. Fuck it. I should just give up on league. It gets way too serious for me. I really don’t want to be a captain, or play anymore at this point. It just stopped being fun for me, and probably because I’m taking it far too serious. I need to get away from everything on days like these. I just get tired of life, and all the shit that goes along with it. Oh, and I also had to deal with a guy coming for the roof, and picking up Samantha while getting stuck in the pool parking lot for 15 minutes, because she was late, and friggin WOSSA was getting out at the exact time that she wanted me picking her up so she could move practice over to UWO. Just an all around shitty day yesterday. Today, the Canadian mens hockey team, is playing to see who makes it to the gold medal final, and who goes to the bronze medal final. While, part of me would really like to watch that, I’m not sure I’m in the right frame of mind for it. I’m still pretty pissed over yesterday. Sometimes, life is just friggin hard.

LOCATION: home office WORDSWRITTEN: 0 PUSHUPS: 30 TODO: read, write, yoga? TV: dr who BOOK: none GAME: Enslaved EXERCISE: squash league WEIGHT: 174 BREAKFAST: bacon & eggs LUNCH: none DINNER: none SNACKS: orange, mixed nuts, apple, banana ALCOHOL: none BEDTIME: 3 am AWAKE: 9:15


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