Morning Pages Entry – July 01, 2014

I’ve learned a while ago now, that being motivated by money no longer works for me. I need to do something that makes me feel right. And at the moment, writing seems to be about the only that that fills the void. I mean, it just so fits into the rest of my life, and as I think back over the years of my life to the things that have made me feel good, it was always the creative stuff that I really enjoyed. And for some reason all these years, I’ve turned away from that path. Not really sure why. If for some reason it just seemed like I never considered it a worthwhile endevour. Or something, that could make money for me. I always wanted to make more money it seems. And now that I think about it, there was always tension in our home growing up when it came to money. I think, that’s likely one of the things that always motivated me in my career choices. I have to wonder how things would have turned out, if I had moved more in that direction. But, I always thought it was just a losers journey to go down that path. That there was no future in it, and that I would never have a stable income. I know a lot of the drum corp people went down that path, and I suppose some of them made a go at it, but a lot of them couldn’t. I suppose, I could have went down the journalistic side of writing or something similar, and that would have at least been a bit more fufilling. I mean, look at how many in our family went down that writing career sort of thing. Dave and Mark were english majors, Tim was an english major … maybe it was in the family blood all along. I have liked the technology thing, but more the creative applications of the technology, like gaming for instance. I always thought I wanted to be a games creator. To be able to create that ultimate world you could escape to and make exactly like I wanted. It could be the perfect world, that I always wanted to live in. As a little kid growing up, and being socially awkward for certain years of life, it’s nice to think, that you can create a perfect world to live in. So, why not do it through the writing thing? It’s something that I used to like to do as a little kid. You can create whatever kind of world and people that you want to. The trick, is to learn how to do it all in an effective way. Anyways, enough babbling for now. I missed my paddle boarding this morning, but maybe tomorrow I’ll get out and do some. If it’s calm enough on the lake, maybe, I can get out on the lake, instead of just down the river. Then, I can try a little bit of yoga perhaps on the board. See if I can remember any of the p90x yoga workout. Probably should be able to remember some of it. So, let’s see if I can get a bunch of words done tomorrow. As much as I would like to get the transcribe thing working, I may be stuck doing the things just by typing. I can get 5K words done in a day, and for sure, that would be pretty cool. The thing is, do I want to do the paddleboarding first, or the writing first. It makes sense to do the paddleboarding first while the lake is calm. Assuming of course, that it is calm. If I could paddle board from say 6:30 till like I start writing at 8:00 then, I could still have 5K words done by noon. And, writing out here is great, because all the stupid distractions from home aren’t around.

TIGERBLOOD: sure DAILYMOOD: good LOCATION: boat bayfield WORDSWRITTEN: none PUSHUPS: none TODO: enjoy the day TV: none BOOK: none GAME: none EXERCISE: paddleboarding WEIGHT: 170 BREAKFAST: bacon & eggs LUNCH: big ass salad DINNER: none SNACKS: orange, grapes, 2 lara bars ALCOHOL: 2 beers BEDTIME: 11:00 AWAKE: 8:30

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