Morning Pages Entry – March 13, 2014

And, here we go on day 101 of our streak, almost halfway through march, and my book, is still not published. I really need to get it in gear on the thing. It’s really just habit it seems. It’s like the more I procrastinate on something, the more I want to proscratinate on something. It’s like every day I put off doing something, the harder it is to get started on that thing. How am I supposed to have six books out by the end of summer, if I keep screwing around on the first one. I need to have it grab me somehow, and not let go. I need to get obsesses with it. I know, that once I’m obsessed with something, there’s simply no tearing me away from it. But how do I choose to get obsessesed with something. I should think about the stuff, that I get obsessed about. I think, the last little thing I was obsessed about, was installing the new electronics stuff just before Christmas. There was the new ps3, the new receiver, the new sub woofer, and the new satellite speakers for the family. That was a bit of work, with a bunch of wiring that needed to be done, and I actually had fun doing that, in spite of all the inevitable frustration, that comes from running a bunch of wiring behind that wall unit in the family room. So, what made it an obsession? What made it so important to you? Well, it definitely felt cool. Researching something new that was cool and figuring out for instance, which receiver, and which subwoofer to get was fun. So, something “new” was part of it. I like new stuff, and it was cool. I could see and believe the benefit / enjoyment that would come from getting the work done. So, new and cool, and believing in the benefits that would come were all part of what made me want to get it done. Showing it off to visitors was also sort of fun. Being proud of it was a part, and bragging about it to people, kind of boosted my ego about it. Not, that I get much of a chance to do that, but it was definitely a part of the experience. So “new”, “cool”, “believing in the enjoyment that would follow”, and “pride in showing it off” were all factors that came into play. How about putting it all together. Something about building things is fun for me as well. Like solving a puzzle, or write a cool piece of software, getting something to work, that’s a bit tricky. I guess the challenge. The challenge of getting something figured out. So, that’s another factor as well. New, Cool, BelieveEnjoyment, PrideShowingOff, and figuring something out that’s a little bit tricky to do. But it’s not to tricky to do. So, that’s pretty good there dude. You know yourself pretty well. Now, can you apply those five factors to writing a book? I think I can. Certainly, this whole thing is new to me. Although, I’ve been writing this first book for a while, and the newness is sort of wearing off, the whole experience is definitely a new one for me. There’s actually a whole bunch of new stuff to figure out, even once you’ve got it ready to go. The cover, the marketing, the formatting, getting it out there, and checking on it every day. That’s all new stuff. And cool, yea, this is definitely cool. You did harbour a dream one time of being a writer, deep in your soul. And now, more then ever, you have an opportunity to make that come true. To be able to do something your passionate about at your age would be an incredible gift. Who else get’s to do that? Not very many people. That’s for sure. And, fuck yea, as well as the enjoyment that comes from being successful at this game, well it pretty much buys you all the freedom any person can want. Sure, I would have loved to have that freedom at 25 or 30, but if I can get that freedom for myself at this age, there’s not doubt, I can let a bunch of it rub off on my kids, and they can enjoy it at a pretty young age, which would be really awesome. I just need to believe a little bit more. And the whole prideShowingOff thing, shit yea of course that applies. How much would you love to tell people, that your a published author and making a good living at it. No more explaining to people about SEO, and harbouring in the back of your mind, how shitty it was going. That’s definitely a boost in pride and showing off. And you damn well know, I will show off as much as I can. And the whole figuring something out that’s a bit tricky, well, hell yes again. Actually, the whole thing in general is more then a little bit tricky, and that may be a bit intimitating. But really, if you think of each little piece at a time, then no, it’s not that tricky at all. Certainly not overwhelmingly difficult. This has been a really good journal. I think, I worked through some stuff here.

TIGERBLOOD: no DAILYMOOD: nuetral LOCATION: home office WORDSWRITTEN: 0 PUSHUPS: 1:40 of plank instead TODO: editing TV: greys anatomy, glee BOOK: none GAME: Bioshock Infinity EXERCISE: none WEIGHT: 175 BREAKFAST: bacon & eggs LUNCH: big ass salad DINNER: pulled pork SNACKS: orange, grapes, apple, mixed nuts ALCOHOL: none BEDTIME: 1 am AWAKE: 9 am

 

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